My Dearest Friend

After criticising the Prime Minister for a long time, the leader of the Labor Party, Mr Charlton, remarked, "I have nothing to say against Mr Hughes."

I weep! I weep, dear friends, to note
    his actions—
His attitude amongst the warring
    factions;
I hate his tone when something has
    incensed him;
But still, dear friends, I've not a
    thing against him.

I mourn! I mourn, dear friends, a
    politician
Who so abuses his august position
Should be pulled down, and let our
    crowd replace him.
I'll ever do my darnedest to dis-
    grace him.

I don't know what weird fate it
    was commenced him;
But, mind you, I have not a thing
    against him.

I've not a thing against him, only
    this—
His legislation has been all amiss,
He cannot rule, he cannot make a
    law.
His foolish talking gets me on the
    raw.
I hate his schemes, his style, his
    silly notions,
His system of ridiculous promotions.
I hate the satellites with whom he's
    fenced him;
But, still, I've not a single thing
    against him.

Friends, as a politician, I admire
Near any man who'll battle and as-
    pire.
But this man, with a vision dull
    and dim—
To tell the truth, I have no time
    for him.
I'd not be sore if Fate abruptly
    "henced" him.
But, please believe me, I've no
    thing against him!