A Letter From the Bush

’Ow’s the world usin’ you?

We seen in the papers up ’ere that Mr Hughes ain’t quite sure wot electorate ’e is goin’ to stand for, an’ I was goin’ to say that if ’e likes to come up ’ere we kin give ’im a safe seat in Parliament—tho’ we can’t promise ’im a safe seat on any of our ’orses.

I sez this to Bill Smith. If we kin git a man with ’is influence to reprisent us we kin be dead sure of all the roads an’ bridges we wants. But Bill Smith sez, “Rats!” ’e sez. “Roads an’ bridges is under the State, an’ Mr Hughes is a Federal member, an’ ain’t got nothin’ to do with roads an’ bridges.”

I seen that Bill ’ad me; but I wasn’t goin’ to own I was beat. So I sez I means roads an’ bridges only figgerative. An’ Bill says, sarcastic-like, “Wot’s figgerative?” An’ I sez, “Of course, you not ever ’avin’ been to school, you wouldn’t know. Wot’s the use,” I sez, “of a coot like you tryin’ to argue with a eddicated man?”

So that starts a bit of a shindy, an’ I got a black eye; but you orter see Bill.

Hoppin’ you are the same,
Yours truly,
Ben Bowyang